NEW EPISODE

Welcome to the Zombie Apocalypse

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Warning: This podcast uses explicit fuckin' language!

Season 18

New episode

Welcome to the Zombie Apocalypse

A pretty immediate mouth full of foam

Oct 22, 2024. Welcome to welcome to the apolocalypse! It contains a potentially new segment called, "Am I wrong about this?" When faced with a Zombie apocalypse, shouldn't you aim for the achilles, or at least the leg? Maybe as a weapon-in-the-head lodging problem-avoidance. (SPOILER ALERT: we might give away a plot element from the first few minutes of pick whichever zombie franchise.) Or, how about many cans of expandable foam? With proper preparation, this could be a winning tactic. If you think your strategy for defeating the next plague of undead is better than some slow-moving farm equipment, let us know by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Half title

Apocalyptic algorithms

May 3, 2024. We are not the first podcast. OK? We start in Pooh Corner. Assume that half the world's population are going to disappear somehow. How could we adjust this event to make it as happy as possible? We should try to see such things in a positive light, after all. In case you are a magician or have an infinite glove or something similar, consider our advice. For example: we randomly alternate who is disappeared every day. There are implications, but we work out some of the logistics, including catering for parties. It's all really fucked up. Thanks Warren! If you're a mime and want to defend your existence, email us (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Bingity Bing Bing Poop Sneeze

A shitty pedestrian title

Mar 28, 2024. We start after a long hiatus with an Urban Legend: sneezing while on the toilet increases poop removal volume by 30-60%, which can decrease the risk of bum and poop cancers. Aren't you glad you know this now? It's all about timing! We discuss what coarseness of pepper is best for provoking a bowel clearing sneeze. But what if you poop too much? Then we discover that Bing can manufacture a superficially impressive description of a hypothetical Limited Appeal podcast in the same style as your scribe (ahem), but with a tiny amount of the effort. Turns out that Bing's topic, title, and description were actually formulaic and quite poor. Some offense. Feel free to write us, Bing, and contest our assessment of your work (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Season 17

Def Bird 2000

You'd be lucky to get a hundred heads

Jan 26, 2024. We hope you will enjoy listening to this episode! Back in the day, I guess. Nope, that doesn't really work, does it? T-Bone heard somewhere that birds can regenerate damaged hearing. It's not clear if we're talking about birds from rock concerts or those near other loud birds. But whatever the cause, it's quite cool they might give us clues for regenerative human hearing! Whether this leads to infinite numbers of heads remains unclear. If you think there's a topological difference between a water cup and a flatworm, let us know via email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Celebrity tits: the movie

Who is to say what is obscure?

Nov 10, 2023. We have a new contest! This is "Who's That Bird: Celebrity Edition", in which Warren will play the sound of a celebrity and the rest of us need to guess who it is. The celebrity is probably not a bird, and may not even be making bird noises, but you'll have to listen to be sure. Warren patiently explains this multiple times, and even so we're not very sure how this works. Spoiler alert: do you know your celebrity entomologists? Or is this a clever diversion to throw you off the piste? Ha! Haha. If you are Hoss and have started listening again after a few years, let us know by email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Season 16

New episode

Animal MMA Part 2

Why there is not just one kind of animal

Jul 14, 2023. In part 2 of our name 5 things series, we make slightly more progress in finding possible animal opponents that a human might be able to take on in a fight, assuming the opponent is human-sized. As noted in part 1, the question is fraught with complexity. You have to fight the organism in its own habitat, but you may be allowed time to put on boots. Despite these constraints, we do come up with a short list of candidates. Without basking too much in this achievement, we then move on to consider which animal might win the battle royale of human-sized animals. Here again, there is some unexpected complexity to unpack, including the context-specific nature of fighting ability depending on one's opponent. We consider the importance of keeping your mouth closed, exploiting your hooves, protecting your neck, and discounting your horns. If you have any suggestions for contestants we have ignored, send us an email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Animal MMA Part 1

How does one snuff a whale?

Mar 28, 2023. After a whole episode of buildup (see Holy Straw, Batman), Warren finally gets the chance to introduce his new topic: name 5 animals, that if they were human-sized, you think you could take them. The rules of this strange fight club have you fighting in the organism's own habitat, so there are no freebies against whales even if you have three pillows and two buddies. We spend a lot of time considering the potential weakness of a long neck, and whether and how that might be counterbalanced by a good knockout punch. We also discuss the virtues of roundedness and beaklessness, and the futility of weapons design for ungulates. But we may not have come up with 5 satisfying exemplars, so there may be a part 2 someday. If you want to make any suggestions for that unlikely second chapter, send us an email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

Holy Straw, Batman!

Going between Adams

Dec 6, 2022. Warren has a perfect comeback topic to get back into the swing of things after a long hiatus, but first a warm-up question: how many holes does a straw have? Are you sure? What about a donut? What about a person? As usual – wait, can we say as usual when we record every year or so? Yeah, whatever, as usual, we do a bit of rambling while counting holes, and our conversation veers through considerations of semantics, anatomy, topology, cloacas, and explosive hydrostatic penises. If you want to opine on the proper criteria for a comparative biology pee and poo contest, or want to complain about the fact that we never actually get around to Warren's perfect question, send us an email (maskedman@limitedappeal.net). Theme music courtesy of General Patton vs. The X-Ecutioners and Ipecac Recordings.

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About us

Limited Appeal is a self-explanatory podcast, really. On a monthlish basis, four old university friends now scattered across the world meet for a Skypechat that is recorded for your detr. . . , er, benefit. Surprisingly, we actually edit out the more boring parts of the conversation, and try to leave you with a few pearls of wisdom that are gleaned from consistently ridiculous points of view on discussion topics ranging from the mundane to the absurd. If you occasionally enjoy some of our conversations, we are pleased.

But be warned: our motto is, "In case you were expecting something, this is what you get."

Name: John

Nickname: Lazy bastard

Primary characteristic: Lazy

Favourite sexual position: On bottom (because he's lazy)

Favourite colour: Lazy

Favourite food: Lazy

Catchphrase: I'm too lazy to write my own bio

Name: Luc

Palindromic birthplace: Wakaw (Saskatchewan, Canada)

Current habitat: Somewhere in Scandinavia?

Fascinations: Christian kitsch, bug sex, shiny objects

Professional activities: Pulling back the foreskin of science, watching bugs have sex, drinking coffee

Hobbies: Attempting the unfeasible, watching bugs have sex, drinking coffee

Turn-ons: Busty Norwegian orienteers, especially the female ones

Turn-offs: Righteousness, spokespeople, righteous spokespeople

Name: T-bone

Glasses: Extra thick

Favorite mustard: French's

Favorite size of mustard: 3.78 litre

Interests: Audio engineer, voice artist, drummer, Vespa diehard, and professional boob enthusiast

Website: www.soundlounge.ca

Name: Warren

Least surprising factoid: My name is warren.

Least interesting factoid: I like the word "factoid".

Habitat: Toronto-ish

Food habits: Primarily carnivorous, with fruits and vegetables playing a lesser role in his diet.

Hobbies: Thinking about stupid things to talk about; chasing cars and slower moving things.

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If you would like to:

be featured in an upcoming "Punch us in the mail sack" segment
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You can send us a message to our rarely used Twitter account.

Credits

Limited Appeal would like to thank all of our fans who have downloaded millions of our podcasts. If it wasn't for you, not much would change for us. But we still appreciate you listening.
We would also like to recognize the following contributors:

General Patton vs the X-Ecutioners

Limited Appeal's theme music for seasons 2, 3, and 4 is taken from the song "A.W.O.L. BLOCK PARTY BRAWL 0600 hrs." Music for seasons 7 and beyond is from the song "Get Up Punk! 0200 Hours" by General Patton vs the X-Ecutioners, and is used with permission from Ipecac Recordings.

Mugison

Limited Appeal's theme music for season 5 and 6 is taken from the song "Mugiboogie" by Mugison, and is used with permission. Huge thanks to Ipecac Recordings.

Dr. D

Music for the following segments was written and performed by Dr. D exclusively for Limited Appeal: Superhero's phone booth, Inventions and shit, Punch us in the mail sack, Nature walk, Pooh corner

Warren

Music for the following segments was written and performed by Warren exclusively for Limited Appeal: Dictionary Plus, Foody Goody, Polish the bishop, Sportage

Hoss

A special thank you to Hoss - our biggest fan out there. His name occasionally makes it into an episode. Now you know who we're talking about. By the way, this may or may not be an accurate photo of him.

Ourselves

All of our episodes are written, performed, produced, edited, and published by Limited Appeal.

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